Sneaky Fits

They're not even three yet, but my kids are minor manipulators and deception artists-in-practice for sure if you ask me.

Emma has what I call "silent tantrums" or "sneaky fits." I think most toddlers have full-on kicking and screaming fits. Well, Emma is a little too reserved for that, apparently. Or maybe she just doesn't want to get her hands dirty. If something doesn't go her way, she doesn't kick and scream like a normal toddler. No, she tenses her body and maybe even makes like she's hugging me, but she's really pinching me or pulling my hair. She holds her breath and subtly grunts and puffs her breath about whatever is troubling her. She wants me to feel her discomfort, to act out, but still come off as innocent to the untrained observer. Ha! It can be so frustrating for me in the moment, but it's impressive when I think about it after. She makes me look like the bad guy in public, threatening to spank her after hugging me. She's good.

She even throws her body in the floor on the sly. She says, "Woah!" like she's being pushed or maybe she's just "accidentally" falling. She'll keep saying, "Woah, woah, woah!" as she tosses her body around in frustration. It's maddening to me, but funny later. Woah, woah--she can't help it! LOL! How can I hold her accountable for something so clearly out of her control?

Emma, Mommy is scared if you are really as smart as you seem at not-quite-three. I better step up my game if I'm going to be able to sniff out your teenager schemes.

Sometimes her sneaky fits are seemingly unprovoked. It's a mystery to me as to what has upset her, but clearly, something has. Perhaps it is Jo-Jo, the imaginary friend, who is upsetting her, and then shaking her all around and pushing her down. And mean ol' Mommy is punishing her for his naughtiness.

So, now I'm thinking of excuses that she hasn't even used for her behavior.

See? Deception artist.

 ;)